10. Top Ten Nazgul pick-up lines
9. Top Ten things dumb elves say about why they left Valinor
8. Top Ten things dwarfs find in their beards
7. Top Ten alternative careers for Gandalf
6. Top Ten Hobbit pick-up lines
5. Top Ten things Mouth of Sauron does to annoy Sauron
4. Top Ten headlines in the Gondor Times
3. Top Ten topics on the Middle Earth version of the Jerry Springer Show
2. Top Ten things found in between Sam's toes

And the number one rejected Middle-Earth themed Top Ten list is...
Top Ten consumer complaints about defective LOTRs movie tie-in products .